Monday, July 8, 2013

Hulk Catholic.

The Vatican Newspaper, L'Osservatore Romano, recently released an article that addresses an issue that most thoughtful Catholics are concerned about:

Is The Hulk Catholic?

No, really, that's the question. Seriously. And the report concludes that the Hulk is Catholic.
Claiming there was ample evidence to suggest the Hulk was a Catholic, senior journalist Gaetano Vallini wrote:
'Is it enough for a person to have a rosary in his hand to be defined a Catholic?

'Bruce Banner, the incredible green man, in fact married his beloved Betty Ross in a church and a Catholic priest presided at the ceremony.
'There are other indications dispersed among the hundreds of comic strips dedicated to him that are said to unequivocally reveal his faith.'
Read more:
Sigh, it's not like I've gone over the religious affiliations of superheroes over and over again. I came to a conclusion around 6th grade that if Thor, a Norse god, can exist in the world, then Jesus can't. Thor isn't real but Jesus is. And if Thor is real, then either Jesus has to be as real therefore making any question about the falsehood of other gods moot or Jesus is not able to really exist in a world that Thor or Hercules or whoever god also exists. And then there aren't true Christians without a true Christ. Therefore there aren't any real Catholics in the Marvel or DC Universe. That's the kind of deep questions I resolved as a child.
MY MIND EXPLODED when this came out. BAM!

Being SO MUCH more advanced now, I've moved away from that thought. There are more comic universes now. So I add: THERE IS NO REAL CATHOLIC IN THE MARVEL, DCU, TOPPS, BLACK COW, WILDSTORM, DYNAMITE, DARK HORSE, and...uhh..COMIC COMPANIES INFINITY!

I actually ran across this site a while ago. I tried to post my "Thor and Jesus can't coexist argument" but somehow they didn't pick up on it. Fine.

Now, all due credit to our Lord, there are some great Christian/Catholic themes in comics. I've found some sympatico with the characterizations of Daredevil, whose mom became a nun.

Daredevil, aka Matt Murdoch's mom, was a nun. A habit wearing nun.
 Of course, Batman is just Catholic to me in that he's dark, mysterious, supernatural and yet human and international in his style. I have to admit, his "black and white" binary style is appealing as well.
There are other Catholics in the comics: Nightcrawler, Witchblade, Huntress, Domino...among others...which I'll just embarrass myself by mentioning.
Domino rocks, if anyone wondered what I thought.

But back to the Hulk.

All due respect to the staff of the Pope's paper: You. Are. Wrong.

If judging by this cover -

(Hulk 319, if it doesn't appear), you assume the Hulk is Catholic, then I have some points to make:

1: The priest is not wearing a ROMAN collar. It's an Anglican collar. His stole isn't a liturgical color and we normally don't wear suits at weddings. We can but not usually.
2. I honestly do not know what that book is that he's holding. Catholic wedding books are usually:
3. There's no altar. Just a chancel rail and some flowers. Maybe it's a non-denominational Church.

So, I say, "Not Catholic". However, rethinking it...non-liturgical garb, no marriage rite, no crucifix or altar? Maybe...just maybe...the Hulk is Catholic but one in the Jackson Diocese.

Which totally isn't true. He'd be in the New York diocese...or wherever he was born that has a Scienceville High School.

Try again, L'Osservatore Romano.